tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55800892011-04-21T13:16:24.056-07:00Its like glass when we Break..good to know that if I ever needed your attention all I have to do it DIE...Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comBlogger901100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1095371583057083242004-09-16T13:16:00.000-07:002004-09-16T14:53:03.056-07:00There are times now when I cant even stand to be around you....the person I knew and liked is gone. I cant believe how much you haved changed, it could just be me thats seeing it.
I cant take it anymore...its just makes me not want to see or talk to you. No matter how hard I try..not matter what I do, it feels as if it doesnt really matter to you.
There is so much I want to say to you...just Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1094360161602864702004-09-04T14:48:00.000-07:002004-09-04T21:56:01.603-07:00The time came, I sit there and think trying to remember just how I wanted this to happen.
Next to me he sits, a perfect person in my eyes. Heart pounding I begin to speak knowing that this is it. I turn to catch your eyes with mine, trying my best to see through your eyes and into your soul. You remind me of just how beautiful a person can be.
yeah dont know why I wrote that, but as Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1094247988206622012004-09-03T12:57:00.000-07:002004-09-03T14:46:28.206-07:00Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you had died? I do..a lot actually. I always wonder just what it would be like if I had done certain situations differently. What a strange way to start off on this thing..asking a question like that. If I did die..who would miss me? How long will people actually remember me? I know people would say they would, but you never really do know. Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1092291072503528572004-08-11T22:46:00.000-07:002004-08-11T23:11:12.503-07:00Tonight was awesome... I just had to post about it. I know I havent wrote in this thing in ages but its time I tried starting back up.
I just cant believe how awesome this night turned out to be. It involed slow danceing, good music, good friends and well just good everything. I got to slow dance with someone I really wanted to! Thats what made the night unforgetable...plus it wasnt just Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1084911314163458262004-05-18T12:54:00.000-07:002004-05-18T13:15:14.163-07:00I wonder just what life has to bring me....
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1082344680833574922004-04-18T20:18:00.000-07:002004-04-18T20:20:56.390-07:00Mixed emotion suck.
the end.Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1080775797646265062004-03-31T15:29:00.000-08:002004-03-31T15:32:34.780-08:00Hmmm ...its been a long week, man I cant believe that prom is this saturday! heck yeah its gonna be awesome. The decorations are looking reallly good!!!!
I am listening to The Spill Canvas right now a song called All Hail the Heartbreaker, its a really good song.....its kinda acoustic rock.
Yeah I really dont have much to say now....its been nothing but school and workin on prom. We stillRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1079671379848725482004-03-18T20:42:00.000-08:002004-03-18T20:45:24.043-08:00Yeah its been awhile...o well. Lets see I am going to prom this year! With a date...his name is Cody Hall. I am really happy to be going with him!! His is such a Awesome guy and I really like him. Yeah....Things have been better since I got to know him a little more.
Hmmm yeah thats all thats happend.Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1076989313251649302004-02-16T19:41:00.000-08:002004-02-16T19:43:46.466-08:00Fight Club is a good movie if you havent seen it you must go watch it nowRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075868998892304622004-02-03T20:29:00.000-08:002004-02-03T20:31:39.170-08:00I wish you could see yourself through my eyes..
I wish I could see myself through your eyes.....so I would know what I was doing wrong..
enough said...Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075782158123885912004-02-02T20:22:00.000-08:002004-02-02T20:24:17.496-08:00...As Time goes by....
threw you the obvious and you flew
with it on your back, a name in your recollection,
thrown down among a million same.
difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed
and passed over
when i've looked right through
to see you naked and oblivious
and
you don't see me.but i threw you the obvious
just to see if Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075698740086768852004-02-01T21:12:00.000-08:002004-02-01T21:13:58.640-08:00"i sit and watch you leave
my life forever
i know youll be gone so long
my last words are nothing
and i tell you i care
and nothing more
i cant say how i feel
so i cry "
I can't believe that your wasting your time
Thought you could find your way back
You heard my story but heard it all wrong
Nothing...
Well it's just so little
And I can see through you
We know it will end
This Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075382419534578352004-01-29T05:20:00.000-08:002004-01-29T05:21:54.326-08:00Its sad.....When certain people think different or see people different just because they dont think the way they do about things...Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075348207015514322004-01-28T19:50:00.000-08:002004-01-28T19:51:41.793-08:00Eh I have a lot of freaking crap on my mind right now. I was sick today and did nothing but listening to music....which got me to thinking.
Damn...this all really freakin sucks, I mean crap....what the heck is my problem.
I have never really felt the way before...dont know if I like it or not. Damn, life is like a blackhole sometimes.....I have been in it for a heck of a long time now.
IRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075263391365744952004-01-27T20:16:00.000-08:002004-01-27T20:18:04.840-08:00 Here I am sitting here alone. With nothing but the darkness and silence around me.
Thoughts of you and I together running threw my mind. Putting on some music to drown out the silence...hopeing it will drown out the thoughts of you too.
I am such a fool....I know that music will only bring me more wonderful thoughts of you.
Music playing now and I start to wonder, are you sitting there music Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1075177686867611922004-01-26T20:28:00.000-08:002004-01-26T20:29:39.200-08:00Its been awhile since I have written in here.
I guess the most that I could do is call you up and tell you the truth...
I am sure you always feel my eyes on you but I hope you never feel unwanted...
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1074468012328650002004-01-18T15:20:00.000-08:002004-01-18T15:21:36.610-08:00Last night at Scars was just freakin awesome.....ah thats all that really needs to be said.
If you have ever been to Scars before you will know that it isnt that big, people didnt really care about that though.
When Shot Down In Left Field ( cole, marrcus, luke and jeremys band) started playing all of us went crazy.
You would never think that a small mosh pit would start but we started one, or Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1074231132118416062004-01-15T21:32:00.000-08:002004-01-15T21:33:33.530-08:00Do you ever notice me??....
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1073714139083838702004-01-09T21:55:00.000-08:002004-01-09T21:56:54.293-08:00Today was a awesome day. Many things happend to make it a awesome day.....One being I got to go into the underground tunnels under the school, that was freakin awesome. There was a bike down there and I rode it around or tried to since there was a lot of low spots everywhere.
We went riding around not to long ago, went to the playgrounds to play. Well Jordan and I saw the see-saws ( dont knowRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1073454416023822372004-01-06T21:46:00.000-08:002004-01-06T21:48:08.500-08:00I am just sitting here with only the light of the computer and the music from my stero. I have been listening to Time to Talk by Open Hand non-stop lately....its a really awesome song. Actually thats what I am listening to now.....it just makes me feel so many different things.
Tonight I was talking to someone about something I would love to do someday and it made me want to do it even more.
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1073280268956435232004-01-04T21:24:00.000-08:002004-01-04T22:11:00.013-08:00Sometimes I just need to ask myself .....is it worth it? If it is, then why I dont just go for it. I think is it.....and I say I should live life to the fullest go for anything. Live once, Live it great. I havent really being doing that lately at all.
Its hard sometimes to just go for something when you dont really have anything given to you that makes you have the feeling to just go for itRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1073116852653179052004-01-03T00:00:00.000-08:002004-01-03T00:02:01.716-08:00I just found a friend in one of your lies
I cant believe my bones when they say so many things
the tell me I am fine. Believe me I try, ever so sweet you make them seem.
The way things go. It's not my fault, and I'll miss you so good and all of those
night we lost our way back home. cant you see this wall you built for me
We're not special. I'm not special. ever so sweet you baked it in cakes Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1073065552446998572004-01-02T09:45:00.000-08:002004-01-02T09:47:00.293-08:00Yesterday was a heck of a good day.
Its so much fun being around great people.
I thought I would figure some things out but ........know I have no clue what to do.
Umm I dunno , I should just give up on it all.
yeah I am going to go do something.Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1072941761491753832003-12-31T23:22:00.000-08:002003-12-31T23:24:29.356-08:00Its a New Year.....a time to start everything over or just to start something new. I went to Luke and Logans house for the New Years since there were having a party and all. It was a lot of fun. I dont know what this year is going to bring me I am just hopeing it is somthing great. I really wanted to be with someone special on the New Year, that was something I really wanted to happen. It Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1072756330319444012003-12-29T19:52:00.000-08:002003-12-29T19:53:14.560-08:00What can I really say in here.
We had another Halo lock in yesterday I didnt go to bed until four the others didnt untill five. There were quite a few players that came. I was on Luke and Codys team, playing against Matt Marrcus and Reeder....Ben sat the game out since Logan had to leave it set it off even, so yeah that sucked. But the whole time was a blast for sure, the game Halo is just Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1072160410208895282003-12-22T22:20:00.000-08:002003-12-22T22:21:08.090-08:00I dont know......I have know idea whats going on in his mind. I just wish everything was out in the open so things can move to Better or Worse.
Thats all I want know. Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1072070304599799992003-12-21T21:18:00.000-08:002003-12-21T21:19:21.560-08:00Whooo Hooo mAn that was a Hella fun time, playing capture the flag is awesome. My gosh we started at like a little before 8 and didnt stop untill after 10:30......gee weez it was so much fun. TimE FLys bu fast when your have some good times. We were trying to get some more people to play so it would be even more fun. Ben and I were watching the base for a sec and decided to give good Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1072038354038328422003-12-21T12:25:00.000-08:002003-12-21T12:26:50.466-08:00Hmmm LeTs see, nothing really new. I had a blast at Jacobs house yesterday playing some good Ole Halo with the guys. Crazy times I tell ya!! I think I played alright, haha not really....the rest of the guys were good though, real good. I wish we could have stayed until 12 but the parentals ( mom) said the bro and I had to be back at 11. Its was all good though we were there since 8:30. WellRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1071724029745896302003-12-17T21:07:00.000-08:002003-12-17T21:08:02.810-08:00I dont know how things are gonna turn out....... it happend tha way it did for a reason.
O yeah....ummm my brother never called me so yeah that sucked
Mmmm tomorrow is Johns birthday. Happy birthday to ya!
there isnt anything else..mmmumm..WhOo RaHhH ( lol , thats from art class today)
ok whatever now. DONE....
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1071635228282807012003-12-16T20:27:00.000-08:002003-12-16T20:28:00.043-08:00Another Promise Made Another Promise Broken, it always ends up that way. I really hate it.....why cant for just ONCE he keep a actual promise to me. I have been doing nothing but cry and cry and cry, and I know crying cant do me any good. I just cant help it, it truly hurts me. Even if on the outside I am not crying I am still crying on the inside. I have been crying on the inside for way toRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1071374572016705942003-12-13T20:02:00.000-08:002003-12-13T20:03:41.123-08:00Here it is a saturday night and I am doing nothing. Err this just really bites. My parentals are haveing a party out in tha game room, and I really dont wanna be out there. Yeah I got asked to go do something witha friend but nooo my mom said I cant cuz we have guest over. So not right. Yeah ..and get this my brother was asked to go spend the night at logans house tonight she said she didnt Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1071031965816428522003-12-09T20:52:00.000-08:002003-12-09T20:53:30.293-08:00My eyes, they say the things I need to
My lips wanting to say them so bad
A hand wanting to hold yours
To spend a day in your presence, a day I hope will come soon.
I like the way I feel when your eyes catch mine
How my heart seems to wonder what yours is feeling for mine.
The warmth of your hand some how needs to find its way toward mine. To know whats there, we could be missing out on Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1070600830203398762003-12-04T21:07:00.000-08:002003-12-04T21:07:50.403-08:00Well heres what all went down today.....UNMMMM..NOTHING. I was feeling SICK=no fun. I am still feelin a little DiZZY and all the other stuff, but I gonna go to school tomorrow though. Geez another band concert tonight, I guess it went all well ..some pretty funny time, bout it. The crowd got to have some lyrics to sing a long with the music. Heck thats Awesome, I would so be singing.
DUDE Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1070516041844389412003-12-03T21:34:00.000-08:002003-12-03T21:34:40.840-08:00My gosh there is a freaking awesome ring around the moon right now. Its just really great to see stuff like that. I was never expecting that when I went outside for a bit.
But dang when I saw it I had to go tell some people I thought would want to see it.
The only person on I thought would think is was awesome was John, and he agreed with me on it. haha. When more people got on I would tell emRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1070243588006668802003-11-30T17:53:00.000-08:002003-11-30T17:53:43.496-08:00I would have to say that this thanksgiving break was the best one ever. I just cant believe what happend. Many people dont know I have another brother, but I do...and his name is Daniel. Something happend about six years ago, that changed my life and it wasnt a good change. It was the last time I had ever really seen my brother. I never understood it and I know I never will. I had been Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069997652386315802003-11-27T21:34:00.000-08:002003-11-27T21:34:45.326-08:00Today was by far the best day of my life, I can even explain how I feel right now!
Everything is running though my mind......I just know, that is was finally meant to happen and I thank God for that.
Thats all I feel like putting in here now.....there will be a lot more what I am talking about in my next post, when I have everything figured out in my mind.
I just dont think that anything Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069709767240658172003-11-24T13:36:00.000-08:002003-11-24T13:37:56.576-08:00I am in a pretty good mood right now, everything is fine again. My friends are awesome, Blanca and her smile card lol, thanks it did make me smile. I told blanca that I wanted to maybe dress up one day for school just because I dont that much......she just gave me a look and I told her that she could go for it. The only reason why I might not really want to do this is for the fact that people Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069621765257767872003-11-23T13:09:00.000-08:002003-11-23T13:09:54.233-08:00This crap is so stupid, I dont really care anymore......people are telling me that he must not so I shouldnt. Well people I dont give a crap anymore, this is all in gods hands and he will let it be what it should. Yes it hurts and I really dont know what happened with it all , I never will understand any of it. He chose with what he did, and now I am going to choose to still tell him what I Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069567776004692282003-11-22T22:09:00.000-08:002003-11-22T22:10:04.343-08:00I am not that pretty. I am not that popluar. I dont like to be what everyone wants. I am told that I am fun to be around and have a great personality. I am just a simple girl, who wants just one thing in her life to go right. I am hurting right now, for once I just cant think of words to put in here about how I feel. Some people know one reason why, no one knows the other. I dont want to Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069455122261246512003-11-21T14:52:00.000-08:002003-11-21T14:52:28.670-08:00AWH man this sucks....my awesoem triangle didnt come out that I made, It just all went to the stupid side. Awh geez that work was done for nothing. Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069454893167300202003-11-21T14:48:00.000-08:002003-11-21T14:48:39.640-08:00Ha, the way my hair looks inspired a girl to get her long hair cut just like it.....I am such a inspriation, haha yeah right.
HMMM ......the rest is just BLAH.......BLAH.........BLAH.......BLAH and some more lovely
BLAH's
Tonight is going to be Boring and Blah
*
**
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069391022026252242003-11-20T21:03:00.000-08:002003-11-20T21:04:08.403-08:00I know, that time moves faster when you're sleeping.
And I know, it's not too good for me.
Because when I wake up, I'm all alone.
It's just enough for me to fall in love with you.
And I wake up, time and time again,
With nothing here for proof.
If I have to wake up one more time,
Without you and these ugly red eyes.
I hate the bright blue sky, to greet me in the morning,
Rather than Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069303907628029592003-11-19T20:51:00.000-08:002003-11-19T20:52:12.356-08:00Today was a good day, and hopefully there will be more. I feel better about somethings now, getting it off my mind ..now I just have to go completely threw the rest. I am though, I cant keep anything in anymore.....after awhile of doing that it just starts to bother me. I used to be realy bad about keeping stuff like that in, but a friend of mine told me that:: As I see it not doing anything isRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1069039089576399942003-11-16T19:18:00.000-08:002003-11-16T19:18:31.840-08:00Here I am sitting here alone. With nothing but the darkness and silence around me.
Thoughts of you and I together running threw my mind. Putting on some music to drown out the silence...hopeing it will drown out the thoughts of you too.
I am such a fool....I know that music will only bring me more wonderful thoughts of you.
Music playing now and I start to wonder, are you sitting there music Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1068850469904055272003-11-14T14:54:00.000-08:002003-11-14T14:54:50.280-08:00Lets see....hmm listening to a real good song right now called Come Back by the Early November. Actually John told me about that song, and a couple more. We were like tradeing songs we liked back and forth last night ha, it was some cool stuff. Both found some new good songs to listen to, so I would say it was a good deal hahaha.
I didnt go to bed untill 12:30 last night....well it was probablyRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1068588183594332792003-11-11T14:03:00.000-08:002003-11-11T14:07:59.833-08:00Music is the best thing ever.........enough said.Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1068516226509054122003-11-10T18:03:00.000-08:002003-11-10T19:31:58.503-08:00Heh...I stayed home today, I didnt feel good at all. Right now as I am writing this I feel better. I dont really want to go to school tomorrow but I have to.
Yeah.....I am just so mad right now, all my emotion are just bottled up I dont know what to do with them. Sitting here crying isnt really helping...there are just things I dont want to deal with right now. Gosh I think I am just going toRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1068426404531069822003-11-09T17:06:00.000-08:002003-11-09T17:06:42.423-08:00This is really freaking bothering me....why the heck it is I dont know. Yeah some stupid thing happen friday that I really dont understand, heck I dont even know why I am writing this in here. O well I am anyway. I cant stand it, I just cant.....my gosh all I wanted to do was get everything figured out so I could feel better about it, but no that would have been to hard for you to do. Just Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1068356707571020912003-11-08T21:45:00.000-08:002003-11-08T21:45:05.050-08:00Being sick= no fun
Ferris Bueller's Day Off= good movie
The Brand New cd= awesome music
Not being able to tell him that I like him= stupid
Writing all of this= PRICELESS
The EndRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1067988243091554262003-11-04T15:24:00.000-08:002003-11-04T15:24:01.516-08:00Have you ever listened to people from the inside....really listen to them. Not just stare at them acting like your listening, but stare in there eyes, show them that your listening. It might actually surprise you what you find out.....I mean just becasue there talking doesnt mean there are not saying something else with there eyes, there tone of voice, anything. Look...really look...even if Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1067673197343170942003-10-31T23:53:00.000-08:002003-10-31T23:53:15.736-08:00Yeah today was about at fun as it could get I guess...I mean I had a blast at some points like durning the football when it was half time..going out there in from of all of those people smileing trying to act like your not nervous then they finally tell who it is.......and it was ME. I am band sweetheart, I cant believe I got it.....I am so happy and proud to be it. That was about the only realRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1067386925454348582003-10-28T16:22:00.000-08:002003-10-28T16:22:04.776-08:00Not knowing how to really explain whats going on in my life right now or how I feel right now...I am just going to sum it up with I really cant take certain things anymore.
Things people do are really starting to get to me ...and yeah I know....who ever reads this is thinking I dont care about this crap. Then you know what I didnt tell you to read this. I am not fixing to Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1067144204606223042003-10-25T21:56:00.000-07:002003-10-26T11:34:30.443-08:00Bands over......we didnt make it to state,my last time to every have a chance to ...my last time to ever preform at a contest for marching. Dang this is kinda makeing me sad knowing I wont ever do that again. O well.
On a much better note I have really been likeing these bands and some certain songs lately..
Midtown-Perfect,there are more but I really like this song
Juliana Theory- Piano Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1066620548442775622003-10-19T20:29:00.000-07:002003-10-19T20:32:03.620-07:00Well Well lets see....some things havent been going just to swell for me lately thats nothing really new though. We went to contest saturday and got a division 1 which means we go next saturday to area in Lubbock, kinda happy about that. Its just that every time we go to contest people always start yelling and getting mad at people. Certain people got mad at me you know the whole yelling and Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1066271787384796982003-10-15T19:36:00.000-07:002003-10-15T19:36:27.006-07:00Alright I am in a much better mood since the last time I posted. I have realized that I need to just let it go and if it happends it happens if not then o well. There is always somenone who will like me for all I am. Even though it will be hard ...I cant let myself get down over something like this.
In other great news.....I made top five for mustang beauty I cant believe it I am just so happy Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1066074860763385222003-10-13T12:54:00.000-07:002003-10-13T12:54:20.133-07:00You know what...why write about it ..talk about it...or even think about it.
Its just not going to do any good for me. The way I feel inside about you about everything in my life is just nothing.....it all turns out pretty much wrong.
I hate the way this feels....
I must try not to let this put me down.......
YEAH whatever.......who cares....you dont ..I dont...so what should any of this Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1066073832735989002003-10-13T12:37:00.000-07:002003-10-13T12:37:12.333-07:00I cant believe how bad this hurts.....wait yeah I can it happends to me all the time.
I knew I shouldnt have even bothered with these feelings I had for him it was all going to not be worth it ...dangit rachel why does this always happend to you why cant anything be good ...for just once
Yeah I dont feel ike talking right now..
As you can see .....I am just not feeling to happy
I will write laterRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1066019687007743122003-10-12T21:34:00.000-07:002003-10-12T21:34:46.810-07:00Yeah I am pretty happy right now....I got myself two new cds
East West-Hope and Anguish
Brand New- Deja Entendu
plus some new ear phones
so yes I am a happy kid right now. Thats all that I should put cuz man that just awesome right there but yeah I have a few more things.....
I got a guestbook so I would be greatly happy if you would sign it .....please and thank you.
I still like him....thats Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1065737915733148062003-10-09T15:18:00.000-07:002003-10-09T15:18:35.633-07:00Yeah.....To think things could be great.....I like him....I just dont know how to tell him.
If only something would happen to help me know.
Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1065576771171689072003-10-07T18:32:00.000-07:002003-10-07T18:32:50.983-07:00Right now my eyes hurt like not other.....they have been for the past few days I dont know if its my contacts or just my eyes...I just know that I want them to stop hurting. Yeah anyway...besides that I am listening to Hope for the Fallen a band whom I know all the members and they are all awesome people. If anyone one of yall read this...yalls music is really good...I listen to the cd just Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1065407977397293912003-10-05T19:39:00.000-07:002003-10-05T19:39:36.986-07:00This weather is just so awesome!!!! Right now I have my window open to were I can look out and see everything.....all this just totally turn my day around....thunderstorms just rock so much. I cant believe how many good things have happened today there werent like a whole lot but there was a couple......and this weather just toped off to make this day great. Heh I was just about to IM Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1065239493602880822003-10-03T20:51:00.000-07:002003-10-03T20:51:32.996-07:00I felt everything needed a change in here.....but yeah who cares. I really dont like smart ass people....sometimes its funny than other times....its just over done. My mood is like way low right now,everything is pretty much going wrong....well from what I know it is. Contest tomorrow...should be interesting...I know none of my friends are going to show up. Wait most of then are in band and Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1064961784412568812003-09-30T15:43:00.000-07:002003-09-30T15:43:04.143-07:00I JUST DONT KNOW ANYMORE......I dont know why I wrote that last post. wait I do....but...dangit.
I really need to talk to someone.....someone that will listen.. .help me figure out whats going on in my mind....but there really isnt anyone to talk to. I thought maybe telling someone about what I am thinking.....could help me figure out how I can deal and understand it. BUT as usual....I dont Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1064892952549955162003-09-29T20:35:00.000-07:002003-09-29T20:35:52.160-07:00Yeah I like someone.....just something about him that makes him stand different than others....dont really know how to explain that...but yeah there is just something. I normally tell a lot of people who it is but this time....there is only three people who know who it is. Thats cole...steven...and kady....thats all I plan on telling unless its the guys I am talking about. I would love to justRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1064527231528303922003-09-25T15:00:00.000-07:002003-09-25T15:01:24.810-07:00I have so many things on my mind right now.....things that shouldnt be that inportant in life but yet for a strange reason its all you can really think about. I just dont understand it...I sit and say to myself its not important it shouldnt be a big deal that you dont have a boyfriend. Yet I sit and do nothing but feel alone at times wishing that I wasnt...yeah I know its kinda pathatic...come Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1063513101939089962003-09-13T21:18:00.000-07:002003-09-13T21:23:47.496-07:00Lets just say that today didnt go to swell....WTAC sucked becasue we didnt move on to finals for some stupid reason even though our preformance rocked and everyone told us it was really good. Geez its suck major to have worked on something since summer finally go to prove what you have worked on and come back with nothing because of something prolly really stupid. I just really dont want to face Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1063141593812219022003-09-09T14:06:00.000-07:002003-09-09T14:06:33.870-07:00Things will get better this I promise you......every since jacob told me to download the song Promise by Spoken I listen to it all the time.....its a great song. Err I am not feeling well right now.....it sucks I cant get sick I have way to much to do this week to have being sick on top of all of it. I am just so happy about sunday comeing up.....I am getting BABTIZED. its so cool my grandma Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1062616679232307062003-09-03T12:17:00.000-07:002003-09-03T12:17:59.250-07:00WOW...its been a long time since I have written in this thing. A whole lot has happened since then...lets see...well flags hasnt changes a bit there is still way to much drama and confusion..its really getting old to me now to were I cant stand it anymore but o well somethings are just like that. We had our first football game and won 57 to 0....I had a alright time the pants that were made Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1061611813068690462003-08-22T21:10:00.000-07:002003-08-22T21:18:34.700-07:00OK....I have been pretty stressed out lately with flags and all...its like the drama line instead of the flag line. No one gets alone very well at times someone is always doing something. Not to mention tonight me and four other girls got in trouble for actually have fun in the band. We preformed for the parents in the dome well after that they did some stand tunes...and we stared danceing to Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1061009254221620802003-08-15T21:47:00.000-07:002003-08-15T21:47:33.643-07:00Dang I still need to write my end of summer thing that I wanted to.....but I just dont have a hole lotta time. Today was the first day of school and I would have to say it was pretty good...I have mostly art classes and with just about the same people as always. Durning third block today I listen to Jamie.Craig,John seth, and Marcus's band demo cd they had...it sounds really good ( I am pretty Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060757089916539072003-08-12T23:44:00.000-07:002003-08-12T23:44:49.956-07:00I was going to post my end of summer thoughts and well other stuff to...tonight but I dont really feel like it I am kinda tired and it would be a long post to write. But to inform people who actually read this which I dont care if yall do are dont but anyway.....life has been doing alright...church has been fun...friends are great....something someone told me really made me happy ....and hmmm...Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060580251019906152003-08-10T22:37:00.000-07:002003-08-10T22:37:31.046-07:00Man I had so much fun saterday night.....I really needed to have a good time. It was all crazy fun ....Cole invited my to go with him and kimberly to John Seths and Jacobs house to go launch some ballons with a ballon launcher they had. Kimberly and I filled up a huge thing full of water ballons...afterward we just went and chilled in jacobs and john seths house for a bit before we went out to Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060390914017341712003-08-08T18:01:00.000-07:002003-08-08T18:49:21.006-07:00I am so mad right now I cant even explain it......I never get to do anything in my life and I mean anything. One of my friends(kelly) asked me if I wanted to come over to john seths house to play halo there..they were having a four tv halo party. But no my mom tell me no because she is liveing in the past thinking that guys should call and ask if we could go somewhere or drop by the house...not Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060318893987963372003-08-07T22:01:00.000-07:002003-08-07T22:08:36.026-07:00Ah man last night the moon was just shinning with all its might......the whole sky was lite by it....it was so beautiful. There was just this ring of light around it. At that moment I felt so calm as if something good was about to happen to me.....I sat there and just let out everything and anything I wanted that was makeing my feel so miserable....hopeing this wonderful site would just take itRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060227855396947312003-08-06T20:44:00.000-07:002003-08-06T20:44:15.300-07:00I am not going to get into detail about how my life isnt going just to good right now....actually for some odd reason it only seems to not be very well when I am by myself.. ah I dont know how to explaine it ....LIFE just isnt my cup of tea right now for several reason. I had fun at church tonight.....that was good... I have nothing else to really say that is of any importance.....flags could Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060142833055955462003-08-05T21:07:00.000-07:002003-08-05T21:07:13.080-07:00Right now I am really mad at the world for several different reasons.....or I guess I should say my life and not the world. Everything for some stupid reason just isnt going good for me......will it ever. Here is a recap on my pathetic life.....ok flags are really sucking right now its like I have no say what so ever everytime I give a sugestion its not even heard...my music was bascily dissed Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1060063592478023362003-08-04T23:06:00.000-07:002003-08-04T23:06:32.513-07:00Well today was nothing much.....band camp and thats it... . .for the important stuff anyway... I did a lot of thinking about some things....thats nothing really new I guess I am always thinking,wondering,wishing....you know the normally stuff. I just had new things to think about.....thats all. It just suxs how things can be so great and yet so horrible at the same time....hopefully you Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1059974256328891962003-08-03T22:17:00.000-07:002003-08-03T22:17:36.340-07:00Man I havent posted in awhile not much had happened up intill the past couple of days. The past two days have been the best . I has so much fun hanging out with Thinh...it was great... I remember everything. Thursday night we talking on the phone until three thirty in the morning.....which was great... we normally talk on the internet at night but dang its much better to were you hear there Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1059374179446285602003-07-27T23:36:00.000-07:002003-07-27T23:36:19.393-07:00Right now everthing is just going through my head......I just cant explain it ...explain how my heart is feeling right now it just hurts so much. I feel as if someone is just stabing me right in the heart. Every since I found that picture of Henry I cant seem to stop wanting to look at it.. my heart just wants so much for him to be here with me in my life. Dangit why did he have to die I just Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1059202262010044892003-07-25T23:51:00.000-07:002003-07-25T23:51:01.913-07:00I went down memory lane not to long ago.......and I starting thinking of my best friend Henry Tran he was in my first and second grade class. The reason why I never had him in anymore......is he passed away in the second grade from a car crash. It was so horrible I remember that day so clear instead of my teacher telling me my mom did because she works with his father and still does I got to Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1059117906338976552003-07-25T00:25:00.000-07:002003-07-25T00:25:06.333-07:00well this day went by as just about any other day......nothing really exciting. I just basicly listened to music or watched music videos. Some real good news is that cooper is comeing down this saturday......but the bad part is instead of staying the whole week he has to leave on that wensday but I am atleast glad he is coming down. I went outside and listened to some music my dad was playing Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1059031063518704462003-07-24T00:17:00.000-07:002003-07-24T00:17:43.446-07:00Blah Blah Blah Blah......thats about how I felt the last part of the day......just so blah. I was just sitting outside listening to music watching this huge storm cloud pass by. I was just sitting there looking at how wonderful this all was......I started drifting off into what I really wish was happening right now.....the way things were was just great. The way I felt and I saw the way I was Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058944626597576892003-07-23T00:17:00.000-07:002003-07-23T00:17:06.616-07:00Well I guess you could say that things have been going just about as good as it can get. I have been hanging out with friends for the last couple of days......normally the have things to do....but it made me realize just how great it is to be around friends you care about. They really brightened up my days so much. I saw a good friend that I havent seen in awhile.....it was great to talk to Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058776987999262452003-07-21T01:43:00.000-07:002003-07-21T01:43:07.926-07:00I dont really know how to put what I am feeling down .....like word for word....but I did write something that pretty much tells how I feel right now so hmmmm. Here it is... The day comes and goes with the vision of seeing you, the thought and memory that we have spent one more day together. Smiles and laughs mixed with tears and worry have made everything I have shared with Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058676599168115452003-07-19T21:49:00.000-07:002003-07-20T15:15:02.890-07:00Today was actually a good day....it was kinda slow at first but it got better. My jeep is finally fixed and has been inspected so now I can drive it in town.....its gonna take some work cuz its a standard and all but it is sooo much fun to drive. I got to watch Shanghi Nights after my long wait for it to come out on dvd.....I thought it was a good movie but I like jackie chan so I think all of Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058511940742999362003-07-18T00:05:00.000-07:002003-07-18T00:05:40.760-07:00Today was a pretty depressing day.....I didnt get up untill me mom made me....if she wouldnt have then I would have just slept in all day. I just felt so blah.... Since there wasnt anything to look forward to that day I thought I would just sleep it away. I also got in a big fight with my mom and I dont even know what it was over. Well after the fight I went to go get my hair cut....I had all ofRachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058424732797729562003-07-16T23:52:00.000-07:002003-07-16T23:52:12.696-07:00Today we had a car wash for flags ...it was cool I got eight out of ten of those big trucks to honk at me...it was great. We were trying to get these cars to know we were having a car wash..so even though we had a sign the other two girls who were there holding it told me I should take off my top cuz I had my bathing suit on. I was like NO way are you crazy..I didnt get to offened by it...but I Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058340885192101622003-07-16T00:34:00.000-07:002003-07-16T00:34:45.130-07:00I am giveing the expression to myself that I think way to much.....of course some thinking is good and required but to think of stuff that you now wont ever really be in your reach. Why think of something that you know wont happen when all the thinking your doing is going to make you feel hurt inside because you cant have it.. Come on I spend most of my time sitting and thinking about that Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058289033454616772003-07-15T10:10:00.000-07:002003-07-15T10:12:16.856-07:00Well all of the stuff I wrote about flags was deleted.....no big deal. It was just me being mad because I had to get up early for no reason.....with it canceled and some of us not knowing. I am still sore and now not to happy with this morning....but its all good .....life goes on. I gonna go listen to some good music and play a video game now.... Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5580089.post-1058242626092278942003-07-14T21:17:00.000-07:002003-07-14T21:17:06.160-07:00Well since I totally screwed up the other blog I had......I made a new one. This time I know what not to do.....haha.
Man am I sore from all of that work I had to do at flag camp...plus on top of all of that I had to go to kickboxing. Geez if all of this stuff doesnt make me feel better about myself then I dont know what will. Ahhhhh ...I dont want to get up early in the morning again. So I Rachelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17515987858782771918noreply@blogger.com